Supporting tamariki after tragedy
In light of the recent landslide at Mauao in Tauranga, I want to gently encourage parents, whānau and caregivers of young children (from approximately under 7 years) to take a considered and protective approach to news exposure and adult conversations.
Events like this can feel especially close to home, particularly for tamariki whose whānau go camping, spend time at Mount Maunganui, or feel a strong connection to this whenua (land). This means extra sensitivity may be needed, even if children haven’t directly asked questions.
Young children do not yet have the ability to understand news reporting in context. Repeated stories, whether on screens, radio, or overheard adult conversations, can feel to them like the event is happening again and again. This can unsettle their sense of safety, even when they don’t have words for it.
For children under 7, they don’t need detailed explanations. What they need most is felt safety. Where possible, consider turning off news coverage, radio updates, and social media videos when young children are nearby. Images and repeated reporting can be especially unsettling for tamariki, even when they appear to be playing or not paying attention. Young children absorb far more than we realise, and protecting their sensory and emotional space supports their sense of safety.
A helpful guide before speaking about events like this around young children is to pause and ask: Is it necessary for my child to hear? Will they benefit from watching or knowing about this tragedy?
If the answer isn’t a clear yes, it’s usually best to save the conversation for another time when they are older and have the cognitive and emotional development to comprehend the event and tragedy that unfolded.
If this blog reaches you after your child has already seen news coverage or overheard conversations, there’s no need to go back and explain everything in depth. Instead, stay close, listen if they bring it up, and offer reassurance. Simple responses like “The grown-ups are taking care of it” and “You are safe” are often enough.
It’s also important with young children to avoid diving deeply into climate change discussions or big, abstract explanations. While well-intentioned, this can quickly become overwhelming and lead to worry rather than understanding.
Instead, focus on small, tangible, positive actions your whānau can take together. Things that help children feel capable rather than fearful. This might look like recycling, reusing items, choosing fewer plastic toys, caring for the natural environment in simple ways like planting trees, gardening, or talking about how people help one another after events like this.
Catastrophising does not help young children. Connection, rhythm, and reassurance do.
In the days ahead, you may notice changes in behaviour. Things to watch for are clinginess, big emotions, or unsettled sleep. Try to look beneath the behaviour with compassion. Children often express what they cannot yet explain.
Our tamariki look to us to make sense of the world. When we respond with calm, care, and loving presence, we help them feel held even when the world feels uncertain.
I hold all whānau who are carrying grief and loss close in my heart, with deep gratitude for those doing the careful mahi of supporting and reuniting loved ones with their whānau. In the time ahead, I hold hope that we continue to move collectively toward treasuring the whenua and caring more gently for our earth.
Arohanui,
Traceylee - Simplicity Parenting Coach